HOW TO OVERCOME SEX ADDICTION

By Olumide T.Agunbiade

 Sex is an intercourse between two willing and able partners. When one is addicted to sex, it becomes a problem especially when it is out of control.

Today, many people are having more and less sexual intercourse due to their work and perhaps lack of one. Some couples are having less sexual intercourse due to their busy schedule. Often, it affects their relationship and ability to give birth. In contrast, joblessness has led many people to sex addiction. Indeed, an idle hand and mind is a devil workshop.

Last year, a married woman was kicked out of her matrimonial home because her husband caught her pants down with their house help. After a paternity test, it turned out that he was not the father of their three kids. Also, a married woman was caught having sex with her boyfriend in a bush in Enugu while her 2- year-old baby was crying on her back. She was so carried away that she did not even notice that the baby was crying until nemesis caught up with her.

Sex addiction is very common in our society today. According to a recent study on sex addiction conducted by this writer, 60% of those addicted to sex in Lagos are women. Majority of these women are single women while others are married. Many confessed that they have sex 15 – 25 times a week. Others claim they masturbate thrice a day while few use sex objects for sexual pleasure.

Unlike Europe and Asia, using of sex toys is not common in Africa especially in Nigeria. Though, some online retail outlets are already selling them. Besides, the governments do not support same sex marriage. However, studies revealed that gays and lesbians exist in Nigeria.

Sex addiction is harmful. An addict may transfer sexually transmitted disease from one partner to another. Besides, it is difficult for anyone addicted to sex to maintain one partner. According to an addict, lack of partner usually lead them to masturbation and the use of sex toys.

Sadly, many children and teenagers have lost their virginity to sex addicts. According to Nigeria artiste, Ice Prince Zamani in a recent interview aired on TV, he lost his virginity at the age of 13 to a woman who was older than him. An expert says addicts will explore all available option to satisfy themselves.

According to medical experts, it is good to have sexual intercourse at least once in two weeks with a regular and trusted partner. The reason is that sex is good for the body system. According to the holy bible, it is a sin for two unmarried partners to have sexual intercourse. Besides, it is a sin for married people to have sex outside marriage. The holy book described both sin as fornication and adultery.

Often, sex addiction and the desire for satisfaction can force an addict to join various sexual groups. According to a female addict, she no longer finds satisfaction with a single partner but with multiple partners. Also, some gays, lesbians and bi-sexual people have confessed to have started as addicts.

Is there a way out? Yes, if the addict can build, maintain and sustain the following habits:

1.      Avoid staying alone at every point in time.

2.      Avoid reading newspapers, journal and magazines that promotes sex.

3.      Avoid watching pornography films and TV programmes that promotes it.

4.      Avoid watching and downloading pornography online.

5.      Break, burn or destroy all pornography magazine and CDs that you have at home or office.

6.      You can avoid masturbation by listening to radio or reading a bible when you are alone in the toilet or in your room where masturbation usually takes place.

7.      Fill your mind with positive and productive activities at all times to avoid the thought of masturbating.

8.      Look for a partner that likes sex and can satisfy your sexual urge.

9.      Get busy if you are not.

10.  Work hard and pray very well to overcome it.

Many people have overcome sexual addiction because in life, nothing is impossible. Besides, with God all things are possible.